Life Yoga

I don’t like you anymore

May 26, 2019
I don't like you anymore

I pride myself on being a realistic minimalist. As in I don’t mind a little mess, and I enjoy having choices in the morning as I get dressed, but I can’t lie: I def get a bit too excited when my sister gives me permission to take over the pantry.

When it comes to decluttering, I go deep. I like to see everything in a glance, may it be in my fridge, on my desktop or my bathroom cabinet.

So can you tell me how the fuck did all this shit ever got on my gram feed? Don’t even think about Facebook. I can run with only 5 pairs of legit leggings and 3 pairs of jeans, but my feed is so messy I don’t want to even hang in there anymore.

That’s how people get sick with social media. The thing itself is neither good or bad, it’s the way we use it that can make it an amazing tool and a fun place to hang out or a space as inviting as your 5-year high school convention.

Don’t get me wrong: I wasn’t following douchey influencers and Insta babes. My feed was filled with great companies doing a pretty good job at social media. It’s not that the posts suck, it’s just they add to the noise constantly, forcing me to separate your gluten-free grain of choice from the chaff to find out the golden nuggets hiding in there.

As IRL clutter, you don’t notice it at first. Like the frog in slowly heating water, you don’t realize you’re about to boil alive. One thumbs up at a time, you start collecting pages on your profil, programming your own virtual burying.

At first, it was innocent, and you were right. Who cared in 2009 if you liked “Real Girls Kick Ass” and “Montreal’s Vegan Dating” pages? But now the game has changed, and with every interaction you are sending a signal. The more you like, the stronger the signal. You vote once every 4 years, and in the booth you think you’re making an informed choice, but in between both moments at the poll, what did you feed your brain with?

Nothing new here, we’ve all heard about Russia. We know about the pink, yellow or gray filters the algorithm colors our Internet bubble with. We know that the more we like and follow stuff, the more we gonna get of it. But we forget, at least I did, how much I get influenced by it without even noticing.

Since the beginning of the year, I’ve been practicing Hast Krya. Every day, the 11-minute meditation is supposedly cleaning my aura. My soul bubble is getting wiped on a regular basis, and I’m seeing more clearly how simple it can be to be happy. Choose your thoughts, take control of your life.

Before you start rolling your eyes, I get it: negative, self-doubt thoughts can be persistent. They’re vicious. They make you think you’re less of, you’re fat, you don’t deserve him. They make you forget you even have a choice, that there is the possibility of an alternate thought.

So what if there was a hack? How can we make it easier to not even get the dirty thoughts in the first place?

By choosing what you’re surrounding yourself with.

Nothing new here again, you’re the sum of the 5 people you côtoyer the most. Except with social media, the equation is screwed. You don’t have the physical interaction helping you make sense of what’s going on, connecting your body, emotions and intuition as you interact.

When you’re scrolling, you move into an hypnotic state, similar to the one you’re in when you’re watching television. You’re more sensitive to the messages you’re being exposed to.

So why not make your life easier by picking carefully the people and brands you’re following?

You don’t get to control the media or the ads pushed at you, no matter what Mark says about privacy. However you do get to choose who you follow, the pages you like, the brands and causes you support. And when you do so, social media is a beautiful thing, bringing us all closer.

So I MarieKondo’d the hell out of my feed. It feels freakin’ amazing, I swear.

Your attention is your most valuable assets. You can only really know a 100 people, as Dunbar says so. So pick your 100. That’s it.

Anyway, who really needs to be following all the coffee shops in Montreal (I really do love coffee) and pro cycling teams (thanks, ex-boyfriend)? I used to think it could help with my work, giving me ideas and expanding my ways. I know, poor innocent creature. It ain’t happening any time soon. There’s only so many hours I can spend on Facebook and Instagram on any given day, and anyway the algorithm shows me the same stuff over and over. There goes the hope of ever finding inspiration scrolling my feed.

You probably didn’t make the cut: I deleted pretty much everyone, except for RA MA (of course) and Beyoncé (don’t want to miss out on Queen B).

Paradoxically, less is more it seems when it comes to social media for me. I finally get why people get addicted to those little rounded square apps. When your feed is clean, when you’re only seeing true friends and expanders, it gets exciting.

For those I left out, I’m sorry. Things have changed. It’s not you, it’s me. I just don’t like you anymore I guess.

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