The sacred void

February 3, 2018
The sacred void

As many of you know, these days, I’m all about magic. The more I study it and its many modalities, the more I love it. Whether it is tarot, astrology, or energy work, it all comes down to open yourself to that deep and fulfilling connection with the cosmic. As within, so without, as above, so below has become my mantra over the last couple of months.

The thing that gets attention at first when you start playing with magic is often manifesting. Like a kid in a candy store, when you start to believe that you can manifest anything in your life following a few simple steps, it’s exhilarating. We are so used to that scarcity mindset, the often-repeated thought that money doesn’t grow on trees, that you have to restrict yourself to put some in your savings account. At first, when someone starts to imply that there might be another way, one that feels good, where you don’t have to work that hard and hustle and grind, our first instinct is often to call her crazy.

However, for many of us, we can’t help wanting to know more. So, slowly, the seed that has been planted grows. Of course, the idea of being able to get anything you want becomes so attractive that I doubt you’ll resist trying some magic yourself.

They say it’s easy, so why not try? You visualize clearly what you want, you keep feeling like you have it, then eventually the Universe will bring it to you. That’s the promise of The Secret. A Ferrari? An awesome husband? A penthouse in Dubai? You name it, you can get it.

Except you might not. That’s when I started to get frustrated. They say you have to fully believe in it, otherwise it won’t work. I knew that part of myself, ok, let’s call it by its name, my left brain, resisted the idea of magic. Knowing that, I worked on it, flooding myself with podcasts and books, quotes and courses, until there was no doubt left in my mind that we are all part of one, big heart, that we are all connected, and that magic is my truth.

Ok Universe, now I believe. Bring me what I want. Bring me that money, that power, that body.

Again, nothing. No big, fat, juicy check in the mail. No JT, or JduT, at my door. No supermodel looks.

Now what? Confused, I went back to my witches to seek answers. This time, the Universe showed me the way in less than 24 hours. Carolyn Elliot was leading the path, as she explained to me that often, what we want with our consciousness, our unconscious resists. This is the Existential Kink. You think you want to get rich, yet your unconscious loves the idea of that poor, delicate lady suffering in her tiny and cold appartement. You think you want that wonderful husband, yet your unconscious really enjoys complaining about not being loved, or is simply afraid of having to share such a deep connection. The Witch’s Key she offers is to completely, fully lean into the shadow. Enjoy this part of you that loves the restriction, the suffering, the scarcity. Go all in. Once you do, it dissolves (at least that’s what happens to me).

Ok Universe, now I get it. I don’t resist abundance anymore (or I’m working on it). Bring me that money, that power, that body.

Again, the Universe answers my prayer, sending Vienda Maria my way. She repeats to me the first step of manifesting: get clear. It’s so important it’s also the third step in her six-step manifesting method (ask for what you want).

Damn. Now I’m screwed.

I thought I was clear. I thought I knew what I wanted. I wanted so many things, I wrote them all down, the list contains at least 35 items, and I could go on forever I believe. But as soon as I start working on manifesting something, I change my mind. I get distracted by the how and the what ifs, and I start doubting my project. My rational mind tells me it’s impossible, I can’t see the way, and I give up. I give up the Ferrari, I give up the hundreds of thousands of dollars, I give up the supermodel body.

I give up because I don’t know. I give up because I don’t care.

Yes, those are all things that would be nice, but I know deep down that they won’t make me happy. I know that’s not really what I want. I don’t believe in that BS. My heart is not into it. I can’t really feel excited about driving a Ferrari, or swimming in a pool of money.

So what now? Where will I ever get if I don’t know what I want? Is my life going to be miserable?

Welcome to the sacred void, my friends. When you know what you are not into anymore, but don’t know what you exactly want yet.

For my Virgo moon, it’s almost unbearable. I need to know. I need to have that plan laid down in front of me.

But I don’t, and I can’t help it. Or at least, I can’t force it. The only way out of that sacred void, that dark and humid cave, is to follow the tiny light at the end of the tunnel. Here comes the sun, in the human form of Martha Beck, showing me how to find my way in a wild new world as a Wayfinder. Again, I get back to square one. Again, I have to move through mystery step by step. The clarity I need to manifest what I want is emotional clarity: my heart is the one in charge here. She gets to decide where we are heading next. She doesn’t reveal the destination, although she is nice enough to share how it will feel when we get there. She shows me how luminous it is, how comforting, joyful, playful, how sweet it feels. Through the beautiful Lindsay Mack, she tells me that I’ll have to take the biggest fucking leap of faith, and that I’ll have to be the most courageous young lady. She’s suggesting me to blossom in the void. 

So yes, there is magic. Yes, you can get what you want. But to do so, you’ll have to find clarity on what you want, to really, deeply feel it in your whole being. The Universe knows exactly what she’s doing. She will make you want what she wants, what we need from you, what you can offer us. Your higher self, the beauty and gifts you have to share, will be revealed to you and to all of us. Once aligned with that flow, when your channel with her is open, she will send you the most beautiful things to help you get wherever you want, because she knows you will listen. This, my friends, is Hogwards 2.0.

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